Episode 25: Our Year With Conan




Art by Boris Valleho

This is it! This week we reflect on our year spent reading the original Conan the Barbarian stories, and what we've learned about Robert E. Howard. These stories are full of passion, action, and adventure! But there is much more to them! If you look closely, you can see fragments of a man's life, his philosophy and outlook, his sense of humor, and yes, perhaps even some of his faults. They are interesting, well written, pulse-pounding adventures that laid the groundwork for the heroic fantasy genre, shades of which can still be seen in the works of modern fantasy authors. It has been so much fun to discover and discuss these stories with you all over the past year, and we greatly look forward to more conversations about the pulp fantasy, horror, and fighting stories of Robert E. Howard as we roll on down the road.

Spend a bit of time reflecting, whenever you read this. Think about Robert E. Howard. When did you discover him? What do his works mean to you? Let us know what you think of Conan. What does this character mean to you? Did we overlook something? We know we left some of the original but unpublished stories behind, but someday we'll revisit those. After a year with Conan, we're ready for some other REH material! Are there stories you're excited for us cover? Let us know!

For now, we leave Conan to his reaving, and depart The Road of Kings to travel for a while along a different path. Season Two of The Cromcast will focus on the heroines of Robert E. Howard's stories. We will post the Road of Queens very soon, and let you know what stories we'll be covering. For next time, the assignment is an exciting pirate story "The Isle of Pirates' Doom", featuring Helen Tavrel, which you can read for free on WikiSource.

Helen Tavrel - Artist unknown

See you on down the road!

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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
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Ending Theme: Anvil of Crom arranged by Victor de Andres. Found at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DYpJkV9Mls

Episode 24: Conan the Barbarian [1982] (Or, Thorgrim is Beside Himself With Grief)

Welcome back, Children of Doom! The purging is at last at hand! Day of Doom is here! It's time at last to talk about the film that launched Arnold Schwarzenegger's film career, Conan the Barbarian! You can pick it up on Amazon, if you don't already have it!

It even has an iconic poster!

In addition to Schwarzenegger, this film stars James Earl Jones as Thulsa Doom, Sandahl Bergman as Valeria, Gerry Lopez as Subotai, Mako as the nameless wizard, and features a brief appearance by Max Von Sydow as King Osric.

This film has a legendary score by Basil Poledouris! You know that Anvil of Crom is in your head right now! It's absolutely incredible, and we can't imagine this film without it. Here's a link to a playlist on YouTube, Conan the Symphony, featuring the Andalucian Philharmonic Orchestra conducted by Mr. Poledouris himself! It's awesome background music, play it and see your productivity increase three-fold!

Check out our friend El Goro's podcast Talk Without Rhythm! He has an extensive archive of interesting film discussions with his co-host The Cancer Man. You might want to start with Episode 187, a look at Solomon Kane (2009) and Conan the Barbarian (2011). Tell him The Cromcast sent you!

This is it, folks. We stand before Crom and must answer The Riddle of Steel. But all is not lost! Next time, it's a Cromcast Retrospective - Our Year with Conan! After that, we will be gearing up for Season 2 of The Cromcast, which will spotlight The Heroic Women of Robert E. Howard. Helen Tavrel, Dark Agnes de Chastillon, and Red Sonya of Rogatino will take center stage as we explore the representation of women in sword and sorcery. It'll be interesting! We hope you continue adventuring with us on into 2014. It'll surely be an age undreamed of...

We'll see you next time, By Crom!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)You know you want to follow us on Twitter!
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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode 23: Red Nails (Or,"A Gang War in T-Town")

Artist unknown

"The city looked very far away across the plain, farther than it had looked from the crag. Valeria's heart hammered until she felt as if it would strangle her. At every step she expected to hear the crashing of the bushes and see another colossal nightmare bearing down upon them. But nothing disturbed the silence of the thickets.

With the first mile between them and the woods, Valeria breathed more easily. Her buoyant self-confidence began to thaw out again. The sun had set and darkness was gathering over the plain, lightened a little by the stars that made stunted ghosts out of the cactus growths.

“No cattle, no plowed fields,” muttered Conan. “How do these people live?”

“Perhaps the cattle are in pens for the night,” suggested Valeria, “and the fields and grazing-pastures are on the other side of the city.”

“Maybe,” he grunted. “I didn't see any from the crag, though.”

The moon came up behind the city, etching walls and towers blackly in the yellow glow. Valeria shivered. Black against the moon the strange city had a somber, sinister look..."

Our tale this week is Red Nails, the last of the original Conan stories written by Robert E. Howard (Read it on Project Gutenberg). It features Valeria, who is easily one of the most interesting secondary characters that we've encountered in a Conan story so far!

Evidently, there was an animated adaptation of this movie that was cancelled at some point during development. We found some test animation on YouTube for you to check out, along with a wallpaper depicting character designs for the film. It seems that they were serious about producing a quality, gritty adaptation of the source material. What do you think?

 

 

 

This is a bittersweet moment, as we have nearly reached the end of the Road of Kings! Don't worry, we're going to keep on bringing you The Cromcast! Listen for our announcement for Season 2 toward the end of this episode!

Our next episode will cover the film "Conan the Barbarian" from 1982. In the next couple of weeks, pop in your copy of the movie, pop some popcorn, immerse yourself in that epic Basil Poledouris score, and settle in for a movie night. Then, join us for a discussion of the film! Let us know what you think of it!

While you're waiting for that episode to drop, be sure to check out Far Fetched Fables and the other District of Wonders podcasts!

We'll see you next time, By Crom!
 

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)

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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode 22: The Hour of the Dragon (Part 2)

This week, we finish our discussion of the only Conan novel written by Robert E. Howard, "The Hour of the Dragon." (Read it on Project Gutenberg!)

Cover to the Lancer edition, by Frank Frazetta

When last we left our hero Conan, he was searching for The Heart of Ahriman, the metaphorical heart of his kingdom. This episode picks up with Conan's pursuit of this ancient and powerful magical artifact. Meanwhile, Xaltotun the Ancient is showing his true ambitions - the full resurrection of ancient Acheron! This story culminates in an exciting battle that you won't want to miss! Let us know what you think of the story!

Only one more stop along the Road of Kings - Red Nails! (Read it on Project Gutenberg!)

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)
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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
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Episode 21: The Hour of The Dragon (Part One)

"I wish that I might see this king," mused Xaltotun, glancing toward a silvery mirror which formed one of the panels of the wall. This mirror cast no reflection, but Xaltotun's expression showed that he understood its purpose, and Orastes nodded with the pride a good craftsman takes in the recognition of his accomplishments by a master of his craft.

"I will try to show him to you," he said. And seating himself before the mirror, he gazed hypnotically into its depths, where presently a dim shadow began to take shape.

It was uncanny, but those watching knew it was no more than the reflected image of Orastes' thought, embodied in that mirror as a wizard's thoughts are embodied in a magic crystal. It floated hazily, then leaped into startling clarity -- a tall man, mightily shouldered and deep of chest, with a massive corded neck and heavily muscled limbs. He was clad in silk and velvet, with the royal lions of Aquilonia worked in gold upon his rich jupon, and the crown of Aquilonia shone on his square-cut black mane; but the great sword at his side seemed more natural to him than the regal accouterments. His brow was low and broad, his eyes a volcanic blue that smoldered as if with some inner fire. His dark, scarred, almost sinister face was that of a fighting-man, and his velvet garments could not conceal the hard, dangerous lines of his limbs.

"That man is no Hyborian!" exclaimed Xaltotun.

"No; he is a Cimmerian, one of those wild tribesmen who dwell in the gray hills of the north."

"I fought his ancestors of old," muttered Xaltotun. "Not even the kings of Acheron could conquer them..."

King Conan - Hour of the Dragon #1. Cover art by Jose Villarubia.

 

This week we begin our coverage of Robert E. Howard's only novel, The Hour of the Dragon! (Read it on Project Gutenberg!) We made it halfway through the story, one episode of The Cromcast couldn't contain all of the awesome within this story! Many familiar themes lie within - resurrected sorcerers, a plot to overthrow the king, large battles, a dungeon escape, and some dungeon crawls and prison rescues with a bit of a different slant! We think that any Conan movie that follows up on the 1982 film needs to be based on this story! Let us know what you think, and join us in two weeks for the exciting conclusion of The Hour of the Dragon!


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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode 20: Shadows in Zamboula (or, Conan Lays the Totra-Smack Down!)

"Conan stood for a moment in the door, the glow of the bronze lamp behind him, looking down the road to where it vanished among the dense palms. Their leaves rustled together in the faint breeze; beyond them lay the naked desert. Far up the street, in the other direction, lights gleamed and the noises of the city came faintly to him. Here was only starlight, the whispering of the palm leaves, and beyond that low wall, the dust of the road and the deserted huts thrusting their flat roofs against the low stars. Somewhere beyond the palm groves a drum began..."

Our tale this time is "Shadows in Zamboula," first published in 1935 in Weird Tales magazine. Howard's original title was "The Man-Eaters of Zamboula." With all of its cannibals, snakes, and less than clothed damsels it was the cover story of course. You can read the whole thing here for free if you wish.

This will be a quick story for you to read and this is probably our shortest episode ever!

Savage Sword of Conan #14

Neal Adams helped to adapt this story for The Savage Sword of Conan. He's got a great style for the tale and drew the best scene with his usual aplomb.

Thanks to comic creator Victor Dandridge for his Ahnold impression to open the show, check out Victor's page or catch him at a comic convention this summer! Also, a shout out to author John Fultz for his kind voice mail. You too can have your voice broadcast across the pod-waves! Just leave us a message (859) 429-CROM! (that's 2766).

That's it for this time! Join us on the next exciting episode of The Cromcast as we clock in with King Conan for THE HOUR OF THE DRAGON!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)
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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode 19: Beyond the Black River (Or, we zigged when we should have Zogar zagged...)

"...I'm a mercenary. I sell my sword to the highest bidder. I never planted wheat and never will, so long as there are other harvests to be reaped with the sword. But you Hyborians have expanded as far as you'll be allowed to expand. You've crossed the marches, burned a few villages, exterminated a few clans and pushed back the frontier to Black River; but I doubt if you'll even be able to hold what you've conquered, and you'll never push the frontier any further westward..."

Our story this week is the superlative Beyond the Black River. Originally published in May and June of 1935 in Weird Tales, you can check it out on Project Gutenberg here! Also, you can download the episode here.

...And we have a special guest this episode... Mr. Mark Finn joins us yet again! We get a chance to catch up, talk about Mark's convention schedule and projects before we get into the story! What a busy guy! Keep up with Mark on his blog, and be sure to check out his brand new collection of short stories, Empty Hearts! You can find it right here on Amazon.com!

We all agree, this is one great tale! It may even be our favorite so far!

Wild lands and hard men on the fringes of society... Hmmm, sound a bit familiar?

 

What are your favorite westerns? Let us know in the comments below! Or leave a voicemail! We can be reached at (859) 429-CROM! (that's 2766). Leave a question / comment and we'll play it on the show! (Thanks, Hattey, for the nice voicemail!)

Our next stop on the Road of Kings will be in Zamboula - read Shadows in Zamboula on Project Gutenberg. Let us know what you think!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)
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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0

Episode 18: The Jewels of Gwahlur & an Interview with John R. Fultz!

Conan the Cimmerian, late of the Baracha Isles, of the Black Coast, and of many other climes where life ran wild, had come to the kingdom of Keshan following the lure of a fabled treasure that outshone the hoard of the Turanian kings...

Our story this week is The Jewels of Gwahlur... Or is it The Servants of Bit-Yakin? Either title works! Originally published in Weird Tales in March of 1935, you can check it out on Project Gutenberg here! Also, you can download our episode here.

We have a special guest this episode... Mr. John R. Fultz joins us!

John is the author of The Books of the Shaper, with the concluding book just coming out this Winter! These tomes are available from many fine purveyors, but to get you started, you can check out the first book here on Amazon.

Or, if you're looking for some tales in shorter form, check out John's short story collection, The Revelations of Zang, here! John keeps a blog here, but he also keeps active on other sites, publishing in the likes of Black Gate, Lightspeed and, of course, Weird Tales!

Finally, John has some great comics to check out. You can get his first issue of Primordia for FREE on Comixology here. 

And speaking about comics, what's that about P. Craig Russell? Ha! We think it's more like P. Craig Awesome! Check out the cover for his interpretation of The Jewels of Gwahlur...

Our next story will be Beyond the Black River. Read it here. Get ready, because it's one hell of a ride!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)
Don't like email? Leave a voicemail! We can be reached at (859) 429-CROM! (that's 2766).
Leave a short question / comment and we'll play it on the show!
Also, you know you wanna follow us on Twitter!
Subscribe to our feed on FeedBurner! Or, check us out on iTunes!
Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Episode 17: A Witch Shall Be Born

Our story this week is A Witch Shall Be Born. Originally published in Weird Tales in December of 1934, you can check it out on Project Gutenberg here. Also, you can download our episode here. 

By the side of the caravan road a heavy cross had been planted, and on this grim tree a man hung, nailed there by iron spikes through his hands and feet. Naked but for a loin-cloth, the man was almost a giant in stature, and his muscles stood out in thick corded ridges on limbs and body, which the sun had long ago burned brown. The perspiration of agony beaded his face and his mighty breast, but from under the tangled black mane that fell over his low, broad forehead, his blue eyes blazed with an unquenched fire. Blood oozed sluggishly from the lacerations in his hands and feet.

What's that you say? This is the crazy story where Conan is crucified? Yup. This is one grisly tale. But surprisingly, Conan takes the backseat for much of the action. 

Our next story will be Jewels of Gwalhur, also known as The Servants of Bit-Yakin. We've heard it's kind of a stinker, but we don't care... We're gonna read it anyway! If you're inclined, you can access it in a number of formats here!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)

Don't like email? Leave a voicemail! We can be reached at (859) 429-CROM! (that's 2766).
Leave a short question / comment and we'll play it on the show.

Also, you know you wanna follow us on Twitter!

Subscribe to our feed on FeedBurner! Or, check us out on iTunes!

Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0
http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

Episode 16: The People of the Black Circle (or, Conan Heads East!)

Conan had witnessed hundreds of battles in his wild life, but never one like this, wherein four diabolical wills sought to beat down one lesser but equally devilish will that opposed them. But he only faintly sensed the monstrous quality of that hideous struggle. With his back to the wall, driven to bay by his former masters, Khemsa was fighting for his life with all the dark power, all the frightful knowledge they had taught him through long, grim years of neophytism and vassalage.

Time for a new episode! This time around we tackle Howard's The People of the Black Circle. Published in Weird Tales from September through November of 1934, you can now read the story on Project Gutenberg! 

Download the episode directly here. And while you're waiting for that, check out Dan Adkins' pulptastic cover for Savage Sword of Conan #18. Oh yeah, and SPOILERS... Conan fights wizards!

Our next story will be A Witch Shall Be Born; read it on Project Gutenberg!

Questions? Comments? Curses? Email us! (thecromcast at gmail dot com)

Don't like email? Leave a voicemail! We can be reached at (859) 429-CROM! (that's 2766).
Leave a short question / comment and we'll play it on the show.

Follow us on Twitter!

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Beginning theme: "Sudden Defeat" by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0

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The Road of Kings (Redux)

When I was a fighting man, the kettle-drums they beat.

The people scattered gold dust before my horse's feet.

But now I am a great king; the people hound my track,

With poison in my wine cup, and daggers at my back.

Hello, friends and fellow REH fans! At long last here is the updated Road of Kings! This post contains links to all of our episodes to date. We're almost up to double digits!

The Phoenix on the Sword (Episode 01)
The Scarlet Citadel (Episode 02)
The Tower of the Elephant (Episode 03)
Black Colossus (Episode 04)
Xuthal of the Dusk (Or, The Slithering Shadow: Episode 05)
The Pool of the Black One (Episode 06)
Rogues in the House (Episode 07)
Gods of the North (Or, The Frost Giant's Daughter: Episode 08)

(Interlude) Episode 09 - Howard's Horrors: The Haunter of the Ring and Pigeons from Hell

We've had a blast producing this show so far, and we still have a lot of work to do! Let us not forget the past as we look to the horizon! What do we see when we cast our gaze toward the future? We have ten more original Conan the Cimmerian stories to talk about! Here is the order in which we'll cover them, along with links to full texts of these stories from Project Gutenberg.

Iron Shadows in the Moon (Or, Shadows in the Moonlight: Full text)
Queen of the Black Coast (Full text)
The Devil in Iron (Full text)
The People of the Black Circle (Full text)
A Witch Shall be Born (Full text)
Jewels of Gwahlur (Full text)
Beyond the Black River (Full text)
Man-Eaters of Zamboula (Or, Shadows in Zamboula: Full text)
The Hour of the Dragon (Or, Conan the Conqueror: Full text)
Red Nails (Full text)

So there it is! Ten more Conan stories to go! We have some other surprises in store along the way, including a very special surprise episode in the next month! It will be an epic journey as we continue on our way down the Road of Kings. Steel yourselves!

-Josh, Jon, and Luke
The CROMCAST

The Road of Kings (Conan the Barbarian Story Order)

Hi all! We'll be examining the original Robert E. Howard Conan stories in order of publication.

Episode 1 covered The Phoenix on the Sword, published in the December 1932 issue of Weird Tales.

Here is our "Road of Kings!"

The Phoenix on the Sword
The Scarlet Citadel
The Tower of the Elephant
Black Colossus
Xuthal of the Dusk (Or, The Slithering Shadow)
The Pool of the Black One
Rogues in the House
Gods of the North (Or, The Frost Giant's Daughter)
Iron Shadows in the Moon (Or, Shadows in the Moonlight)
Queen of the Black Coast
The Devil in Iron
The People of the Black Circle
A Witch Shall be Born
Jewels of Gwahlur
Beyond the Black River
Man-Eaters of Zamboula (Or, Shadows in Zamboula)
The Hour of the Dragon (Or, Conan the Conqueror)
Red Nails

We'll try to stick with that order, but we also want to cover Conan comics, pop culture, and the character's influence on music. We'll throw those episodes into the mix and try to keep it interesting and entertaining!